Sunday, February 12, 2012

Last Thursday and Friday of French School and Strasbourg.

THURSDAY:
The only mildly thing that happened that was interesting that day at school was during lunch. We were all lining up to get food and the line was really long. A and all her friends were kind of getting pulled away from me but I was not really bothered to do anything about it. But then, a wild G appeared (who's not gay by the way)! So J was dragging me forward trying to get me to squeeze through this gap and G just kind of uses his really long arms to push these people out of the way and he's yelling, "MOVE! SHE'S NOT FRENCH!" and kind of pushing me forward.
Long story short, he almost raped me but I was reunited with my group.
Then for the afternoon, me and this other Australian called Sarah went into town. It was great. We talked English, did some shopping, weirded out the French who were startled by the laughing foreigners, and I did my impression of what happened when my button fell off of my pants. To cement our friendship, we both got these necklaces which are MAGNETIC COOKIES. I win at life.
FRIDAY:
Considering that this was my last day at French school ever, Friday was extremely anti-climatic. It was kind of like, welp, guess I'll be going then.
I finally gave this girl called N the recipe for Coca Colala cake, about two weeks after she asked me. And I kind of screwed up because she doesn't know what type of measurement a "cup" is. WELP.
When the French were studying for their little test in Gestion, I was listening to my iPod. We were on the stairs and some chick walks past and for no apparent reason, G kind of fake screams out, "SHE IS UGLY, SHE IS UGLY". He caught me staring at him in a kind of bewildered way, laughed at himself, and tried to explain to me what "dommage" means (damage, harm). I didn't really react properly. By that I meant I went "Mmm..." a lot because I wanted my music.
STRASBOURG:
I went to Strasbourg with my host family minus A plus Q. Golly, it was fun. We took the car and after about an hour of driving we stopped at some weird shoe outlet place in the middle of nowhere. Everything was seriously over priced and shoe shopping bores me but we ended up staying for like an hour. After, McDonald's where I tried the McFarmer- pretty good if I knew how to eat a burger without getting sauce all over my hands.
We arrived at the Uni at Strasbourg because C wanted to check it out with Q and E, so me and G (host mum) hit the town. I don't know whether it was because everything was on sale or whether my mind was like, "Fuck it. Last week, go for it" but I bought something in pretty much every store we went into. I got the following:

  • a t-shirt
  • a dress
  • a pair of shorts
  • a bag
  • a pair of glasses
  • two pairs of knee high socks
  • one pair of tights
  • a blouse
That's about it. I know Tara and Amanda won't care and Steph has seemed to have killed her blog, but alright. We saw some protesters wearing those Anonymous masks, protesting against ACTA. I approved, but didn't join in partly because it's against the rules and partly because G wanted to look at shoes. It was actually kind of scary because there was riot police, fully kitted out, watching them.
After shopping, we met up with E, C and Q to check out the cathedral which is MASSIVE. Wikipedia says that is 142m tall, but I would have said 800. Who do you believe? It was pretty freaking freezing, so we went to this restaurant in Petit France where I ordered lamb kebabs, and shocked my host family (minus A plus Q) by telling them that in Australian we eat kebabs with our hands. E said, "We are not barbarians".
And then, it was driving home in a warm car. I napped.
FYI:
All the little quote things were actually said in French. I just can't be bothered and also, for Tara.
Story:
I am shocked that no one had bugged me about my story. So, Steph, post your poetry. I dare you.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Now I Can't Think of There Without Thinking of You

Just FYI:
I am coming back from France a week early because of the maths homework. I chose to do this ages ago.
I knew that this was going to happen, Amanda and Tara. I anticipated this. You guys obviously did not.
Steph, stop telling everyone that I am slutty in France.
Just as a side note, I bought these awesome black, lace-up boots that are just under knee high height. They are bad ass and not at all a bit My Immortal.
VIDEO:


Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Last Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday at French School

I'll break it up so my blog is slightly more organised than usual. Blog, meet subtitles. Subtitles, meet your worst night mare.
MONDAY
After being away from school for like a whole freaking week without any real explanation the French all kind of took it in their stride, which I guess is kind of nice. I forgot that I wasn't actually that close friends with R. For instance, I went to kiss him on the cheek, perfectly routine in France, and he seemed seriously startled. Like I had just pulled a firecracker from my ass. Another example is we had "free time" on the computers so he went on Facebook. I tutted at him, and he just looked up at me grinning at him like a madwoman and went "Quoi?"
I was meant to have my last sports lesson in my entire life ever, but the teacher wasn't there so we didn't have it. Too bad, I was wearing my really cool Converses.
I was watching TV with my older host sister C and I didn't understand something, so I turned to her but she had this big white mark all under her nose. Turns out it's for the cold, but you should've seen my face. Come to think of it, I should've seen me face.
TUESDAY
During the little break inbetween periods, I saw Sarah. Of course, I ran down the stairs and she ran up and we both kind of collapsed into each other. Did it weird out the French? It would have if they could see us.
During my *last* cooking class, the prof kept on asking me things. Do you have Nutella in Australia? (Yes) Do you have these strawberry flavoured things in Australia? (No.) Do you know what custard is? (Yes.) My answers never failed to surprise him. At the end he realised it was my last so we shook hands.He's a very nice man.
Last TP, and guess who me and A were paired up with? (DUN DUN DUN) HFD!
At first, we didn't speak. I mean, he did ask me whether I had *discovered* a lot of things in France but I wasn't really contributing to the conversation. I had to cut these carrots into sticks but they had to be EXACTLY the same size so I ended up using about half of the actual carrot as food worthy. So I 'm here with this ridiculously large pile of useless carrot and the only thing I can think is, "Golly, that's a lot of carrot." Which at that point, my brain found extremely funny. Because I was staring intently at this pile of carrots without doing anything to the observable eye, HFD goes, "Ca va?"
Me: Mmm...
HFD: C'est dur, non? (It's hard, no?)
Me: (negatively) MMM...
And my brain went, "An Abundance of Carrots" so I couldn't even function enough internally to do anything.
After we had finished serving the clients, A asked me whether I wanted any cold half burned french fries. I said no. Then she asked me if I wanted this half cooked semi-warm tomato. Of course I said yes. And then HFD was asking her about her grandfather who died recently and I was kind of in between them trying to look solemn whilst eating a tomato, which just doesn't work. A goes back to work but I still have to finish my tomato, so HFD goes to me;
HFD: (he said this in French, but fuck that) You have something on your nose...
Me: (rubbing face) Is it gone?
HFD: It's the tomato. Do you like tomatoes?
Me: No.
HFD: Why are you eating one?
Me: Why not? (This is actually my reason for a lot of things, like coming to France or my choice of clothing)
HFD: You're right.
That's right, ladies and gentlemen, my twisted sense of logic and process of decision making is considered "right" in France. And just to finish up, the last interaction I had with HFD and probably the last ever, was when he was walking past and yelled in my ear, "BAARRP", or some equivalent.
WEDNESDAY
I got to sleep in a little bit because we go to school later on Wednesdays. I even got a ride from my host father because he works at the Uni just near my school and sometimes he has lectures the same time as our classes.
Had a maths test on quadratic equations and sketching parabolas, which apparently is actually going to follow me where ever I go, without any language preference. I'm vaguely sure I did alright, but I'm worried I didn't do it the "French" way. The level of maths is lower than my usual class in Australia, but that's fine. Helps me with the language.
Found out that THEY HAVE DOCTOR WHO IN FRANCE. Yes, yes and double yes. I cannot express my feelings right now. I also know how to change the TV options so it is in English, simply because I want Tennant's voice, not some French imposter. It was the season with Donna, which I have not watched, and to boot it was the episode with Jethro. Where have we broken down at? THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE. I can thoroughly say without a doubt that that is a Win, with a capital W.
I've also just received a package from the company I'm on exchange with. Inside is travel details, advice, a survey and a certificate that says I have officially completed three months on exchange in France.
EMOTIONS
Because it is my last week and a bit in France, my emotions have been playing the rollercoaster ride. At one point I'll be all like, "YAY! A return to the English language and friends and family and my dog! WOO HOO!" and the next I'll just be really, really anxious. It's miraculous I haven't started screaming and pulling out my hair yet.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Now this is just sad.

Because I have time before lunch, I shall finally explain what exactly has occured during the week and recount my travels.
The inherent lack of persons at my normal host family's house due to a death in the family meant that I've been staying at their cousin's house, which has been a lot of fun. They have two little kids, both girls about the ages of 8 and 10 I think and I've always interacted better with children. Probably something to do with similar attention spans. And also because it's difficult to get to school from their house I haven't had to go. Victory can be assured.
They have a little puppy as well called Gimov- the cutest beagle ever. I've forgotten how easily excitable puppies can be. We went to this château yesterday and Gimov flipped out because there was snow everywhere. She just ran and ran and ran in circles. 'Twas extremely amusing.
I decided to introduce the young ones to my childhood, so I showed them the Spice Girls. They love it; but they keep on calling it "Spicy Girl". I also showed them this website called "Doll Divine" (guess what that's for) and taught them the nutbush.
I've been walking a lot with the dog and my host aunt, because it's so damn beautiful here. As fore-mentioned, 'tis snowing here and as a person who lives in a country where if it gets under 10°C I go out wearing five layers, it definately is a new experience. Usually on our walks we pick up the girls from school and one of their friends said that I was, and I quote, "trop belle". (Too beautiful for Tara). Don't believe me? She also drew me a picture and wrote that on the side. So if all else fails, 8 year old French girls find me attractive.
On weekend mornings, the kids watch French Disney channel, and that is usually the time when the play those really crappy and really old Disney movies. Yesterday it was something about girl who hates this singer but her sister loves him and then she meets the singer and they fall in love. And despite him sleeping in her garage and being stranded together, they never once kiss. Today it was a 90's movie. I know I should probably say "90's Disney was the best EVA!!! <3" but honestly, it was crappy. It was another rockstar themed one in which this all girl band needs a singer that can dance and sing so their nerdy but super hot friend makes a hologram for them that can do all those things. It got really deep at the end when the main girl fell into a coma because she was pretending to be the hologram because the hologram was in the Internet and so the hologram came back and went into the main girls body to wake her up but then it was the hologram not the girl so she went and danced in the rain and then became part of the sky or some shit like that. There was two kisses in thsi film, so I guess Disney was a little risqué back then.
In exactly two weeks from now I will be back in Australia, and how I feel about that can be perfectly summed up by this:
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